For the last week or so, I have been trying to think of a good blog post. I didn't want something too generic, but rather I wanted something heartfelt and sincere. Now, with it being Friday and looking back at this past week, which has been a rather crazy one, I think I know what I need to write about. Just to give you a fair warning, my writing may seem a bit vague in this post, but I have done that intentionally to respect those who inadvertently play a part in this story.
This has been a long week. Did I say that already? For those of you that do not already know, I am looking for a job again, but thankfully I am starting a part time job next week and I have a bunch of applications out for a full time job. So that has been draining. But the hardest part of this week has been that people in my life are hurting. I have gotten way too much tragic news about young deaths lately, particularly from my dear alma mater, Appalachian State University. They have had 8 student deaths this school year. EIGHT. And I knew one of them.
Y'all, this breaks my heart. We are TOO YOUNG for this to happen. I have been praying unceasingly for the students up in Boone and those who were personally affected by these deaths. It's almost too much to bear. What a hard year it has been for my Mountaineers. And on top of that, I have talked to several close friends this week that are hurting. These friends are having relational difficulties and just general life struggles. Many of these are things that I have never dealt with personally, so it tends to leave me at a loss for words. In those moments, I quietly ask the Lord to give me the words to say. I was on the phone with a friend earlier this week during one of these situations. I was listening to this friend talk and I was praying over and over, "Lord, what do I tell this friend? Please tell me what to say because I have no words." Then, out of nowhere, the Lord spoke. Now, if you're not religious, this may seem like crazy talk to you, but stay with me. When the Lord speaks to me, and it does not happen often, it comes as an overwhelming thought that I cannot give myself the credit for. The thought comes out of nowhere and seems to make no sense, but it is impossible to ignore. So at that moment, this overwhelming thought came to the forefront of my mind. It was simply four words:
Tell her your story.
Ummm, what? My story? I knew exactly what story God was referring to, but it seemed a bit far-fetched. My story was way different than what she was experiencing, but nevertheless, I began telling her my story. This story, in vague detail of course, involves me at a younger age, thinking I knew exactly what God's plan was for my life, until He came in and abruptly stopped me in my tracks, challenged everything I thought I knew, and turned me around in a 180, shoving me in the opposite direction. My major, career goals, and my dating relationship at the time all completely changed. As I shared the details with my friend, everything I was saying started to connect with what she was experiencing. As the words left my lips, chills went up and down my spine. I realized that though the stories were vastly different, everything coming out of my mouth was relevant to her situation. When I finished, BOTH of us were in shock. I am telling you, there is NO way I came up with all that on my own. Then I heard one more gentle whisper that about knocked me over.
CarrieAnn, when this happened to you all those years ago, you asked me over and over why I let you go through it. Why you had to hurt, why you had to learn these lessons the hard way. Here is the answer to your unceasing questions of "why." When you went through that challenging season of life, I gave you a gift. I gave you the gift of a story. You received that gift in order that you might share it with others. Now remember to use this gift.
Hearing those words stunned me then, and they still do now. My story of suffering and hurt was a gift? This concept has totally changed my perspective on how I view past trials. From the time I was young, I have been taught to view every hardship as a learning experience and as an opportunity to share wisdom with someone else. However, I did this with a disgruntled heart and an attitude of bitterness. Oh how I hope that has changed now.
So I pose the question: What would happen if we started to view the hurt of our past as a gift that we used to help others? Now, I understand that some people have been hurt very deeply and even recalling slivers of memories is too painful to bear. It took me a while to be comfortable with sharing my story. But once I did, it was amazing to see how my simple story of shortcomings and young foolishness could speak so strongly to someone else. Or maybe the hurt is too recent. Please, by all means, take the time to process and to heal. But once you are ready, I encourage you to speak. Tell your friends that need to hear that you are not perfect. Tell that person that is struggling with a similar issue. And if you can, try to view your own story with optimism and gratefulness. I was very frustrated with my story for a while, but now looking back, it has brought me to where I am today. It is the reason I married the man I did, and that alone, I would not change for ANYTHING. That challenging season has brought more goodness into my life than I ever thought possible.
Who knows the kind of good we could bring into the world simply by sharing our story? It could prevent suicides at colleges. It could help save a friend from making the same mistake you did. It could prove to someone that they are not alone. It could give a needed shoulder for a neighbor to cry on. Go figure, this frustrating season of unemployment that I am in will probably be a story that I eventually share as a word of encouragement. Not for a while, but eventually!
To end with a word of encouragement that is not my own, below is a link to a Josh Groban song that was just released this week. Its title is "The Mystery of Your Gift." Coincidence? Nah, I don't believe in those. Give it a listen, and pay close attention to the words. You'll find they are quite fitting.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ZGjK2LtaIE
And so I have said it, if you know me and want to know my story, I am very willing to share it over a cup of coffee or tea (no Starbucks please). And if you have a story to share, I want to listen. I am excited to hear about what you have experienced that you can use to serve others.
Now go, and use your gift. :)
~CA
Friday, January 30, 2015
Sunday, January 11, 2015
New Year's Resolutions
Wow. I had no idea it had been so long since I had posted. I told yall I was going to be bad at this...oh well. At least I'm back now. :)
Now, I am fully aware that New Years has come and gone, but I have been spending the last week or so playing around with resolutions in my head, and finally, I think I am ready to put them on paper (figuratively speaking, of course). I have narrowed down these resolutions to 5 particular items, four being more on the fun side, and one being on the serious side. If that seems like a lot, or even too many, maybe it is. But isn't that what resolutions are, making goals and seeing whether or not you keep them? Plus, I don't feel like these are too much, so we will see what happens with them. They are ordered from least to most important. So, here you go:
Resolution #1: Keep up with this blog
I really do want to be better at regularly posting here, so this had to make the list for 2015. I have also been told that some people actually do read this, which was humbling because I never really expected that. But anyhow, I hope to be better at keeping yall updated. I am going to aim for at least once every two weeks. Is that enough? I hope so. :P
Resolution #2: Make at least one "cookbook meal" every week
I probably need to explain this one. Most of you know that I love to cook. Most of you also know how much I love books. Combine these two loves and what do you get: cookbooks. LOTS and LOTS of cookbooks. The problem is, I have not really been using a lot of these cookbooks. They just sit and look nice on my shelf, which is really not okay with me. Therefore, I've decided to force myself to use them weekly. It's really quite simple: I pick one meal/main item from a cookbook to put into my meal plan each week. My goal with this is two-fold: 1) I want to have different/unique meals each week instead of falling into the same old mundane meals, and 2) by the end of 2015, I want to know which cookbooks should stay and which should go. I've been in a purging mood since Christmas, can you tell? :) Oh and in case you are wondering, my cookbook meal for this week is Greek Chicken-Lemon soup. :)
Resolution #3: Learn more about essential oils
This one is broad, I know, but I did that on purpose. I started learning about essential oils last summer, and I did a lot of research about different companies, and in September, I chose to get involved with the company of Young Living, and I have been in love ever since. These little bottles of oils have changed the way I live (which I know sounds crazy, but it's true!). I plan on making a post soon about my journey with essential oils, which will give more info. But anyway, my resolution is to try at least one new oil every month, and to read more books about them so that I am more educated.
Resolution #4: Complete the 2015 Reading Challenge
As I mentioned in Resolution #2, I love books. I really love books. You can ask my husband; we really need a new bookshelf. I was a voracious reader when I was young, but once I got older and school became more demanding, I was not able to read for fun as much. College made it even harder, but I would try to read in the summers. However, this is the first year of my life that I am not in school, so I am planning to take full advantage of that. A friend of mine posted the 2015 Reading Challenge on her Instagram, and I decided to accept the challenge as well. I even printed my list out and put it in a frame above my desk so that I can check off each item with a dry erase marker. I figured that would help with the whole accountability thing which is supposed to come with resolutions. :) I am already finished with two books and am currently on #3!
And finally, here is the serious resolution:
Resolution #5: JOY
Yup, that's it. Just one word: joy. And go figure, there's an essential oil blend I use called Joy (that really was just a coincidence, promise). It's a funny little word, one that a lot of people don't really know the meaning of. Is it an emotion? A state of being? A name? I believe that joy is not a feeling, like happiness. I believe that joy is a choice. A choice that people must consciously make every day. A choice that I did not make in 2014. I allowed the cares and struggles of this world to get me down and put me in a hard place in 2014, but I do not plan to let that happen in 2015. I know that the Lord will provide for me and that He is in control, but it is time for me to take that knowledge and turn it into a heartfelt decision to be joyful in all circumstances, both good and bad. 2015 may have just started, but I can already see that it is full of uncertainties and I know that it will bring a lot of big changes for my family, but instead of being fearful and anxious about the unknown, I choose to have joy and to trust that whatever God has for me this year is far better than anything I could have done myself. :)
So there you have it. My New Years Resolutions. I hope I did not ramble on too much. I am so excited to see what this year brings. 2015, I'm ready for ya.
Now, I am fully aware that New Years has come and gone, but I have been spending the last week or so playing around with resolutions in my head, and finally, I think I am ready to put them on paper (figuratively speaking, of course). I have narrowed down these resolutions to 5 particular items, four being more on the fun side, and one being on the serious side. If that seems like a lot, or even too many, maybe it is. But isn't that what resolutions are, making goals and seeing whether or not you keep them? Plus, I don't feel like these are too much, so we will see what happens with them. They are ordered from least to most important. So, here you go:
Resolution #1: Keep up with this blog
I really do want to be better at regularly posting here, so this had to make the list for 2015. I have also been told that some people actually do read this, which was humbling because I never really expected that. But anyhow, I hope to be better at keeping yall updated. I am going to aim for at least once every two weeks. Is that enough? I hope so. :P
Resolution #2: Make at least one "cookbook meal" every week
I probably need to explain this one. Most of you know that I love to cook. Most of you also know how much I love books. Combine these two loves and what do you get: cookbooks. LOTS and LOTS of cookbooks. The problem is, I have not really been using a lot of these cookbooks. They just sit and look nice on my shelf, which is really not okay with me. Therefore, I've decided to force myself to use them weekly. It's really quite simple: I pick one meal/main item from a cookbook to put into my meal plan each week. My goal with this is two-fold: 1) I want to have different/unique meals each week instead of falling into the same old mundane meals, and 2) by the end of 2015, I want to know which cookbooks should stay and which should go. I've been in a purging mood since Christmas, can you tell? :) Oh and in case you are wondering, my cookbook meal for this week is Greek Chicken-Lemon soup. :)
Resolution #3: Learn more about essential oils
This one is broad, I know, but I did that on purpose. I started learning about essential oils last summer, and I did a lot of research about different companies, and in September, I chose to get involved with the company of Young Living, and I have been in love ever since. These little bottles of oils have changed the way I live (which I know sounds crazy, but it's true!). I plan on making a post soon about my journey with essential oils, which will give more info. But anyway, my resolution is to try at least one new oil every month, and to read more books about them so that I am more educated.
Resolution #4: Complete the 2015 Reading Challenge
As I mentioned in Resolution #2, I love books. I really love books. You can ask my husband; we really need a new bookshelf. I was a voracious reader when I was young, but once I got older and school became more demanding, I was not able to read for fun as much. College made it even harder, but I would try to read in the summers. However, this is the first year of my life that I am not in school, so I am planning to take full advantage of that. A friend of mine posted the 2015 Reading Challenge on her Instagram, and I decided to accept the challenge as well. I even printed my list out and put it in a frame above my desk so that I can check off each item with a dry erase marker. I figured that would help with the whole accountability thing which is supposed to come with resolutions. :) I am already finished with two books and am currently on #3!
And finally, here is the serious resolution:
Resolution #5: JOY
Yup, that's it. Just one word: joy. And go figure, there's an essential oil blend I use called Joy (that really was just a coincidence, promise). It's a funny little word, one that a lot of people don't really know the meaning of. Is it an emotion? A state of being? A name? I believe that joy is not a feeling, like happiness. I believe that joy is a choice. A choice that people must consciously make every day. A choice that I did not make in 2014. I allowed the cares and struggles of this world to get me down and put me in a hard place in 2014, but I do not plan to let that happen in 2015. I know that the Lord will provide for me and that He is in control, but it is time for me to take that knowledge and turn it into a heartfelt decision to be joyful in all circumstances, both good and bad. 2015 may have just started, but I can already see that it is full of uncertainties and I know that it will bring a lot of big changes for my family, but instead of being fearful and anxious about the unknown, I choose to have joy and to trust that whatever God has for me this year is far better than anything I could have done myself. :)
So there you have it. My New Years Resolutions. I hope I did not ramble on too much. I am so excited to see what this year brings. 2015, I'm ready for ya.
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